Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Another Update

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday! I was contacted by another acro friend and it made me realize I haven't posted in quite a while due to the holidays and all (that and my extreme laziness lately!). It's been nice to email with people and learn their stories, to know we're not alone in this. I feel horrible for not following up with everyone like I should. I just don't seem to have the energy lately. I don't stay on my computer more than an hour or two a day now.

My health has been very good lately though. I've been receiving 40mg of Sandostatin (one injection on each side now) for almost 3 full months. I go back to see my endo on 3/3 when it's been 4 full months of the 40mg, and I'll probably have another MRI in April. My MRI's have been excellent, no regrowth. I think my theory of TMJ may have been off. I got a night guard but haven't worn it. But since starting the 40mg of Sando my headaches have dropped off significantly. I'm so happy that I no longer have daily headaches. I do still avoid things that seem to trigger the headaches though, like opening my jaw too wide, and wearing my hair in a ponytail. I think reading books may be causing me headaches as well. I'm an avid reader, and I always hold my books in my left hand. I noticed the muscles of my left shoulder all the way up to the back of the left side of my head are always very sore and tight. I'm trying to adjust how I hold my books now to see if that helps.

The fatigue is always with me though. I did have a very nice holiday, and I did have fun. But going through the holidays depressed me a little because socializing seems to tire me very quickly, having to concentrate so much on what everyone is saying and to prepare my replies carefully. It's much harder for me than if I were allowed the time to compose my thoughts in writing. The holidays made me conscious of just how much I didn't interact with others, as opposed to how much I used to before the acro. I felt like so many times I was very quiet, and basically felt like an observer, letting all of the conversations flow around me but not contributing, watching as if I were outside my own body. I try to stimulate my mind by reading and playing games. But when it comes to making conversation I'm never able to recall as much as I'd like, and therefore I'm not able to contribute as much as I'd like. I can't remember so many things from my past, things I learned in school, things I should've remembered even about important current events that I've lived through. I wonder how much of it is age (I'm turning 32 soon), and how much is the acro. I notice my hair is graying already and I'd like to blame that on the acro too haha :-)